Father Figures

I think almost everyone here should cherish the fact that they grew up with a nice father figure. I didnt. I grew up wanting nothing to do with my dad, and its still like that. My mom was telling me yesterday about how her parents would go to every even of whatever it was that was important to her, my mom tries her damndest to but sometimes, she cant, thats ok. But my dad, makes no attempt to even be a part of my life. I never had a dad that would go play catch with me in the yard, or anything cool like that, my dad just wanted to get drunk, or high, and I think you should all be thankful for the wonderful parents you have that are involved in your life.
Im sorry about this post, but I needed to get that off my chest.

No need to feel sorry! That's what we're here for!
It's not just you. Plenty of us have had parents that were emotionally unavailable if not physically as well.

I had a dad that I know loved me, but HIS SPORTS AND LIFE was more important to him than my mom or I. He even insisted in living out HIS LOVE OF GOLF AND DESIRE TO BE A PRO in my life, since he was not good enough to be a pro. I had to put aside my life to practice, practice, practice a sport I was good at, but did not enjoy enough to want to make it MY LIFE!

I had to be on the Boys golf team, even though the first 2 years, the coach did not want a female on his team! The 1st year the guys did not want me there either. But by my SR. year I was the best golfer on the team and the guys hated the coach and saw that I could help the team win, so they made me co-capt. of the team. The coach was then pressured into playing me! And Other teams thought it was great I was golfing (even though they were not happy when I beat them :haha: ).

I loved track and field. So I made a deal with my dad that if he allowed me to be on the track team, I would then golf.

I even had to go to HIS CHOICE OF COLLEGE instead of where I wanted to go, because MSU was the Womans Golf Big 10 Champ for several years, he made me go there! I wanted to go to Eastern Mich. Univ, or U of M (where I would be on the starting team right away). But no, it had to be MSU. I really enjoyed the university, but had super pressure to try to make the traveling squad. My studies suffered due to all the time I had so spend on the golf course! By the middle of my 2nd year I finally told my dad to jump in a lake, I was not in college to golf, but to earn a degree! (I was not on schlorship.)

Because of the pressure he put on me, I finally dropped out of college and worked. I did continue going to community college, and when my dad retired he insisted we ALL move to FL so he and I could golf year round! He got me involved in a countryclub, and got me a golf pro to work with me. Again, he was very forceful and would not take no for an answer. The Pros thought I could be a great golfer, if I was willing to spend 12 hours a day at practice! I finally told him no! I wanted to golf for fun only, go to school and work.

I ended up going to community college to get a degree in Real Estate, and after getting a lic. in FL (passed the state boards on my first try) and sold Real Estate for several years. I finally went back to university at the U of So. FL and earned 2 bach. degrees (and I never even looked at their very nice golf course!)

So yes, I know how fathers can be, on the opposite end of what you put up with Garrett! I think you are doing very well, considering the household environment you have to put up with! And your choice of sports, and other school activities will be a great outlet to help you be who you are.

You have a good head on your shoulders (please keep it there by not getting into too many bike accidents ) and you know what a father should not be! Chances are you will make a great father and husband someday, because you see what a bad father results in, family wise!

Keep up the good work Garrett, we are all with ya as friends!

(by the way, the long hours of golf is what destroyed both my knees.) People don't realize the damage Pro level golf does to the knees...just look at Past Pro Nancy Lopez (artificial knees now,) and Tiger Woods -- already having lots of knee problems.

I have a pretty good relationship with my dad. My parents divorced when I was 5 and I always lived with my mom, but my dad is just 5 miles away. Now that I can drive, I go over to his house fairly frequently to watch sports and stuff like that. We go to baseball games a few times a year and hockey/football, too. There's more than sports though...we once went to Europe for a month (without my mom or sister) and that was pretty fun. He was a former disc jockey for about 20 years before I was born so he taught me quite a bit about music and we share a lot of interests there. We both watch the same type of movies as well.

I guess that's about it....I'm sort of named after him, too. My middle name is Edward and I'm the oldest (and only) son. His name was Edward and he was the oldest. His father was named Edward and he was the oldest. His father was also named Edward and was the oldest. Even though I didn't keep the Edward first name, it's still my middle name. For the record I think Ryan makes a better first name today than Edward does so I'm glad my mom's dad's middle name was Edward (she convinced my dad to make Edward my middle name to honor both families).

I guess that's it?

Wow. My father was/is wonderful. He taught me to play ball and fish and he's even the one who taught me to swim. He was a truck driver and wasn't around much, and when he was home, he slept a lot during the day and we had to be very quiet because if he got woke up, he was very scary. But on his off days, which yes, were few and far between, he did everything right. He rarely made it to my sporting events, I played volleyball for 6 years straight in junior high and high school and I don't recall him ever making it to a match but he tried hard to come to my ball games when he could.

My mother on the other hand never came to anything. I recall one time when she came to my softball game in high school and it was a game where I got hit on the hand by a pitch and she had to take me to the ER. That's the only game I ever remember her at :haha:

MY dad didnt even teach me to play ball, it was my tee ball coaches and myself.